This middle-aged white American lady was a researcher who interviewed young women (ages 18 to about 25) around a part of Europe and a part of the U.S. about the stigmas, experiences and attitudes towards sex that they had learned/observed/lived through as kids/teens, and then as young adults. She emphasized throughout her video that pleasing their boyfriends was of greater or equal priority to being pleased themselves, for the hetero ladies. At the mildly short video's end, she said that when asked when they felt they first lost their virginity or something they would call their virginity/naivety, and how they would describe it, some lesbian women claimed it was once they first climaxed and some heterosexuals claimed it was once they had vaginal, not oral or other forms, of sex. She asked some of the heterosexuals when they first climaxed from sex, and some claimed they never had.
We can further discuss this "cumming gap" or disparity between men and women in the comments or at another time. It is significant. I would want to argue that it is significant especially after marriage, but of course, what about before? Doesn't practice make perfect?
Anyway... What do we define as virginity or as a physical marker of it for men? And what can count as its loss for men and women?
Maybe remarrying after a divorce makes you regain your marital virginity and lose it again. Maybe getting out of retail and getting a real job is me losing my career virginity. Maybe we should stop using the term slightly out of turn all the time like adolescent wacky kids. Or maybe we should use it so much that the word has no definition. Until the word falls to a somewhat speedy but somewhat slow and excruciatingly painful death.
Maybe there is no age to being a virgin. If we are all striving to be pure or have great wisdom, we are all reaching to be closer to God. And if we are all His children, we are all reaching towards a nature and peace that is infinite. We are all infinitely virgins and infinitely ex-virgins. Maybe a 5 year old who doesn't yet understand division but knows how to tell time and a 95 year old who doesn't yet know the names and stories of all great world leaders from the start of global history but can tell the difference between a political fool and a real leader are equally virgins. Married or not. And equally ex-virgins. Maybe, without an exact age to the exact moment of one's virginity loss, we can all live without feeling too old or too young for what we have or have not experienced. Either way, does Jesus want us to live in the past or future or to live a life in shame? No.
Now does renewing sexual virginity or letting go of a dangerous spouse or partner or striving for peace while fucking as a single Christian thot make me better than someone who is not at all a virgin? And less good then being a lifelong or single-status-long virgin?
How many ducks do we have to give before God gives up on us and doesn't want to f*ck with us any longer? When do we lose our child of God card? If cumming makes me experienced, is simply cumming from using a dildo once in my life making me hell-worthy as much as a girl my age who sucks or f*cks every night before marriage?
credit: www.ted.com
